Poopageddon

Today was the first day of real school for the kids...as in the kind you have to dress them and drive them to, vs the kind that happens every morning when I chase them around the house waving math worksheets at them (while Robbie chews on that brand new Pinterest project I was so sure would be the key to mastering skip counting). 

The morning got off to a slightly rocky start with the usual missing shoes and last minute discovery Robbie had gotten into Charlie's leftover cheerios.   It was only slightly more stressful thanks to Jim telling me our car's catalytic converter could be sucked through the engine at any moment and that the struts he replaced last night meant that I may have to drive down the freeway sideways in order to go straight.   I wasn't sure what that meant....should I take surface streets, or drive with my hazard lights on?  Not drive over 60mph...30mph...10mph?   Which is reaaallly hard to do when you're running late.    I ended up driving down the freeway fast, then slow, then fast, then slow as my foot and brain caught up and played tag team with each other.  "We're late!"  "Slow down"  "We're late!" "No, slow down." "We're late!".   I'm not sure what the other cars on the road thought of the gray Altima going 70mph then 50mph....then 70mph...then 50mph. 

While I was belting out songs about Charlemagne, and praying my car wouldn't spontaneously start break dancing down the freeway, I heard a rip in the back seat from the direction of Robbie's carseat.    Another plus for cloth diapers is that those wonderful snaps are harder for mischievous toddlers to get undone than the paper velcro on disposables, because yeah...Robbie undid his diaper and then proceeded to unload.    Jamie and Charlie were like horrified sports commentators as I started the slow process of getting my poor car off the freeway and into the parking lot.   "Robbie is rubbing his feet in the poop!"  "He is now dipping his pacifier in it."  "He's painting the back seat with POOP MOM!"  

Awesome.

Amazingly, after all that CC went great.  I love my class.  I'd happily tutor every day if it meant being in an air conditioned building...but of course I do it for the children.  *cough* *cough*

I also managed to turn post CC into a giant fustercluck as I went racing to the mechanic after school.  But somehow we got everything done and everyone home in one piece.    I hope the rest of the school year goes more smoothly, although honestly I secretly don't mind even the traumatizing poop drama.  At least I'm not packing anymore, and my children are great little distractions.  They keep you putting one foot in front of the other.   I don't have enough time to stress out too much about everything.   

Week 1 done.