Wednesday, June 18, 2014

Out of the woods is worse...

I probably will piss off the fates and regret saying this, but I almost prefer the projectile expulsion of fluids during the stomach flu versus the post illness recovery phase.    When kids are sick you can't help but feel sorry for them, they're all cuddly and hot and for the first time in months you get to see them sit still for more than ten seconds at a time.    Plus, you spend so much time doing laundry, mopping the floor, scrubbing the toilet and disinfecting every surface in sight, you don't have time to get frustrated.    (Side note, how is it that my house is simultaneously the nastiest and cleanest it's ever been?  I swear dwarves could mine diamonds off the sides of my toilet, it sparkles so brilliantly.  Never has it been this determinedly scrubbed ten times a day).    I know it's all hard work, and nobody wants the stomach flu to hit their house, but ohmyword it's the aftershocks that threaten to overwhelm me and send me over the edge.  

Like the moment you kick everyone off of the piles of towels in your room, and send them back to sleep in their own room.  Oh the horrors.   I'd say it was a tear-inducing festival of hysteria, but seriously everything causes drama right now.   It's nonstop, "What do you mean I can't eat jello for every meal now?"   "Why can't I watch TV endlessly anymore?"  "He touched me" "Well he looked at me funny."  "I'm tired."  "I'm hungry...no I'm not hungry...yes I am hungry."     

It goes on and on and on, and quite frankly I'm done.  Peace out, this is where I get off.    

Someone please tell me everything will go back to normal eventually, because right now I feel like someone has switched out my normally good natured, sushi consuming, high energy children with limp impersonations who won't eat anything but plain pasta and complain that swimming is boring.   Bah.

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